We’ve all heard horror stories about people who lost control of their own weddings. We’ve seen the pictures of the new mother-in-law who decided to attend her son’s wedding in a bridal gown because it’s “her big day, too!” You’ve likely heard horror stories about being forced to have a wedding that wasn’t really about the couple getting married. How do you manage to keep your sanity when you’re planning your wedding?
The answer is being your own advocate — but that can be hard to do when you’re trying to hold your own against people you love and want to please. Here are three tips that can help you speak up for yourself while you’re wedding planning.
1) Remember That This Is Your Wedding
While you’re planning your wedding, you may be a little worried about coming across as a “bridezilla.” While it’s definitely a good thing that you want to keep your loved ones’ feelings in mind, make sure that doesn’t cross over into making you unhappy at your own wedding. Ultimately, your wedding day is about you and your spouse and a celebration of you. This means that you have a right to speak up for what you want.
This also means not including aspects of a traditional wedding that don’t work for you. You don’t have to get married in a religious setting just to please your family if that isn’t a part of your life. You can pick and choose aspects of traditional weddings and family traditions that speak to you and make you happy. Remembering that you don’t have to include things just to please other people can go far for making sure that your wedding feels like you!
2) Have Backup
Sometimes it can be very hard to speak up for yourself, especially if you’re feeling pressured by people that you love and respect, like your parents or grandparents. It can be very helpful to designate someone that knows how you feel and can speak up for you, or back you up when you speak up for yourself. Your Maid of Honor is a good candidate for this role, or perhaps one of your siblings that is comfortable speaking their mind. Their main job is going to be in your corner. Choose someone you know will listen to you and they can be your wedding planning confidant.
3) Limit Who You Share Planning Details With
One of the best ways to avoid trying to sift through lots of conflicting opinions that may not work with what you want for your wedding is to not reveal your plans to many people prior to your wedding day. One of the biggest places to keep this in mind when it comes to wedding dress shopping! While you may be tempted to have your entire wedding party plus many of your relatives and your future spouse’s relatives with you while you try on dresses, lots of differing opinions may lead to you making choices to please others instead of you.
Need help making your wedding truly your own? Check out Fan C Design’s bridal collection to find the dress that truly fits and feels like you.