Although it might be scary, feeling nervous about your future is totally normal. So normal, in fact, that we have a name for it: cold feet. You might be asking yourself if you’re making the right choice or if you’re moving too fast. The decision to legally commit to your partner is a big one and you would hate to make that huge of a mistake, especially with your friends and family all watching! Chances are, if you’re feeling anxious about your upcoming wedding, it’s just a bad case of the jitters. Here are some tips to help you relax and enjoy the wedding process and how to be confident that you’re making the right choice.
Remember: Weddings Are Stressful
Are you anxious about the wedding or marriage? There’s a pretty big chance that you’re actually anxious about your wedding and not so much worried about your upcoming marriage. This is very normal, especially if you don’t normally enjoy planning parties and don’t like being the center of attention. Weddings can be high stress situations in addition to being expensive time commitments- you might feel better if you rethink your wedding strategy by simplifying your big day. You may even opt to skip the wedding and elope instead! If you’re feeling better about the situation after you simplify your wedding plans, you can continue to move forward knowing that you made the right choice for you! If eloping isn’t in the cards, consider hiring a wedding planner to take some of the planning burden off of you and lean into any help your friends and family offer.
You may also want to designate a “no wedding prep” day each week where you absolve yourself from worrying about the wedding. Save the emails to your caterer for the next day and don’t feel guilty for doing little things for yourself that have nothing to do with your wedding. Try to hang out with friends and family — this is extra important if all of your energy has been going into planning! Your favorite people might be missing you and would probably love to help take your mind off things.
Consider Professional Help
Lots of people seek out professional help in the form of a therapist. Although you might not think you need it, if you’re wondering if your case of jitters is normal, you might benefit from talking to a neutral third party who can help you process your feelings. Remember that planning a huge event that signifies a change in your life can be extremely stressful: it’s normal to need a little extra help. If you are concerned about the costs of a therapist, double check your health insurance — sessions may be covered. You may also have free or low cost resources in your community, such as a pastor that can sit down and chat with you about how you’re feeling.
Talk With Your Partner
It might seem like a no-brainer, but try sitting down with your partner and talking about what’s bothering you. Talking about the wedding can help ease your fears. They may be able to take some of the wedding prep stress off of your shoulders or help you figure out alternative plans that don’t leave you anxious and overwhelmed. If you are concerned about your future as a couple, you definitely need to talk to your partner. You may want to double check that the two of you are on the same page regarding your life goals. Once these details are ironed out, you should feel better.
Try scheduling regular date nights with your partner — maybe once a week if your schedule allows or every other week. Remember why you want to marry them and have a great time while you do so. These dates don’t need to be elaborate; it can be as simple as cooking a favorite meal at home, watching a movie, and turning off your phones and focusing on each other for a few hours.
Refocus and Ground Yourself
Ideally, you’ll be feeling better after you take a few steps and assess your nerves. Ultimately the need for a happy life is much more important than having the perfect wedding day. Focus on your friends and family, your partner, and ultimately your own happiness. Balance everything and you’ll have nothing to worry about when it comes to planning your big day!